Trauma

Seek the wisdom

that will untie

your knot.

 

Seek the path

that demands your whole being.

Rumi

Very few have had a trauma-free life.

The content and what we experience from them

vary as much as we do.

Some traumas are particularly grave.

They alter us.

They drive our behavior.

They are at the root of our fears.

Some people duck for whatever cover they can find,

doing whatever's necessary to avoid more,

and avoid looking at, or thinking about what impacted them.

Trauma can make our lights go out.

Anger and fear can cause us to disconnect from ourselves.

Sometimes disconnecting is the only way to survive the unspeakable.

The effects can show up as phobias, shying away from the world, getting into dysfunctional relationships, being abusive, acting out,  self medicating, and doing otherwise self destructive things.

It's not a life.

It's a limp.

Distress impacts the physiology.  It eats away at our life force and our physical systems begin to breakdown and go haywire.  Broken down physiology can include pain.  These are stress additive.  The physical challenges also dampen our cognition, impact our mood, dim our clarity and awareness and our ability to use sound judgement. These can cycle back and around on each other and make a mess of our life.

 

At some point, a time comes when we feel more able and ready to move forward.  We want to let go of what’s traumatized us but we don't know how.

We may find a therapist where we feel safe.  Safety is key.  Sometimes it takes more than feeling safe and talking about where we feel stuck.   

 

The Chrysalis may provide what you've been hoping for.  It doesn't change the drama, but it changes your relationship to it.  When people feel open and allow in the feeling of quiet it often enables, it can ease the traumas so their sting loses its grip.

The earliest therapists to worked with the Chrysalis found a correlation of the states of their clients to the Polyvagal Theory.  They observed them shift from states of fight/flight/freeze to the quiet safe feeling called "ventral vagal". It's from this state that people are able to move ahead and enjoy their life.

Change

While some people are at their wits end, desperately wanting life to be different, they may also fear "change" and disruptions to what they're used to.  However the changes are natural to us - they are at the core of our being.  

 

For some, embracing change is more a matter of reconciling persona as separate from who they are.  Sometimes it takes a bit of inner wrestling to let go of our adaptations and reach for, and allow, the right to be our innate self.

  • Occasionally people have so acclimated to the adaptations of their life, they feel disturbed about they feeling  better.  They may at first feel relief, but then experience a sense of threat to the status quo and tighten up, pushing the gains away to resume their familiar anxiety or fear.  We referred to this response as a rebound.  These people require a slow process that gives them plenty of space to ease into and appreciate their gains.

  • There are also people who are incredulous about the "changes" they feel. They look to assign the Chrysalis feedback  attributes to something else, anything else, even tho that something else had already been in their life and hadn't yet opened that door.  For some, they take the changes for granted because what they experience is a deeper aspect of who they are.

  • Sometimes a person's awareness is too diminished to recognize the effects from the Chrysalis.  Before their awareness increases, others in their life may notice what they can't.  Such aspects of them:  being more easy going, less stressed, more expressive, more relaxed physically, standing taller, having more resolve, speaking with a more resonant voice, more engaging, noticing they're more able to absorb new material, to sequence, track conversations, remember in ways that used elude them, trying new things,  no longer procrastinating, etc. 

The benefits of the Chrysalis can be rather shocking.  They don't make a lot of sense on the surface.  Yet.  They do make sense.  The balances within our physiology are dependent on a great many things going well including the oxygen available to the mitochondria and the nutrients we consume.  The oxygen level and the nutrient intake may be perfect, yet not bio-available where they are needed.  It may seem confusing  when what seems like disconnected parts of us shift; it helps to remember, all of our parts and systems are connected and are interdependent. 

 

When what's "stuck" frees up,

a cascade of possibilities can evolve,

not least of which is feeling lighter.  

 

We can fuel those possibilities

by making the best possible choices,

such as what we eat, what we do and what we expose ourselves to.

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more about

Distress

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